Top 7 Ways to Grow on Substack

Spoiler Alert: I don't actually know how

1. Post a note that starts with
   ”Dear Substack,
   Connect me with people who like dragons, care about comma placement, have never used placemats, and like to paint mustaches on squash.”

   1. Note: It’s not clear why this works. It doesn’t seem to work for everyone.

   2. But it has worked for enough people.

2. Write a clickbait title. Try something like “Top 10 Ways to Grow on Substack.”

   1. Note: If this title works better for you than it does for me, let me know.

3. Make sure that your substack is getting enough light, water, and proper nutrients. Maybe a finger prick to see that everyone has enough Vitamin D.

4. Read a lot of Robert Bly.

   1. Note: I’m not sure this will actually help.

   2. But, maybe you’ll get visited by his ghost and that would be cooler than getting substack followers anyway.

5. Pick a niche.

   1. But not too niche-y of a niche.

   2. But don’t be not niche-y enough.

6. Write stuff on your substack that people like to read*.
   *Unfortunately, this is (most often) impossible to know.

7. Money.

   1. I have so many questions about paid substack subscriptions.

   2. If I had world enough and time, but mostly money bucks, there are so many substacks I would happily pay for.

   3. So, let’s play out this scenario:

   4. Jes would like to be a paid subscriber for 11 substacks. (A conservative number.)

   5. A substack is roughly $6/mo.

   6. That’s $66/mo and $792/year.

   7. Does Jes (a single mom, a radio producer, and a writer) have an extra $66/mo to pay for subscriptions?

      1. No.

I’ll keep reading all the beautiful things on Substack that are free. And maybe someday, when the financial crush eases, I will subscribe to all of you.

In the meantime, keep coming back here for random advice, wandering observations, bits of philosophy and poetry, that hopefully keep taking us to a place of larger hope.

Photo by LinkedIn Sales Solutions on Unsplash